Monday Musings 7-5-21

The last few months have been a combination of highs and lows, joy and fear, excitement and exhaustion. Essentially, they’ve been a study in contrasts, and the fluctuation alone has been draining. At one point, I had to keep a physical list of the people in my circle who were suffering in some way just to make sure I remembered to check in on them. At the same time, we celebrated my third son’s birthday and graduation, had all our children together for the first time in nearly two years, and were able to experience beautiful, simple things, like dinner with friends, that had been off-limits since COVID.

As I approach my fiftieth birthday (yes, it’s tomorrow), I’ve come to realize this juxtaposition of opposites is how life looks when you’ve reached a certain, ahem, maturity. Not that challenges weren’t part of life when we were younger, but our social circle is larger now and filled with people of all ages, our bodies are a bit older, and we’ve been on the planet long enough to know we won’t escape life unscathed.

Life offers us a myriad of experiences, which may be perceived as good or bad, and often they’ll be handed to us at the same time. So, how do we find peace and equilibrium amidst the flux? I don’t have all the answers, but I think it helps to simply acknowledge this is the case. When I truly accept that the nature of the human experience is complex, I can make peace with it. I can allow myself to find joy even in times of sorrow or pain. I can be grateful for the simple things, and not overlook them when my world feels particularly tumultuous. I can love fiercely and joyfully all the time.

“If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment.” - Carlos Santana

IN OTHER NEWS…

I’ll be at Tampa Bay Comic Con with a few fabulous fellow RI authors from July 30-August 1! If you are in the area, come visit us. Panel schedule TBA!

Little Daisy should be arriving on July 12th. We can’t wait to meet her, and I promise lots of pictures!

Ten years ago today, I summited Mt. Kilimanjaro with my sister and two friends. It was the adventure of a lifetime and I am eternally grateful for the experience.

Monday Musings 12-9-19

I’ve been reflecting a bit on two seemingly opposite life philosophies. On the one hand, I’ve come to appreciate the long game - this idea that Rome wasn’t built in a day so to speak. A perspective that we can take time to deeply engage with something, whether that’s our career or our art. Parenting provided me with the ultimate long game perspective. I’m literally watching and guiding other human beings while they take decades to grow into themselves!

Years ago, when I was still in medical school trying to juggle parenting, studies, managing a home, and trying to pay some attention to my husband, a wise mentor suggested that yes, I could likely achieve all my goals if I stuck with them, but I certainly didn’t have to take them on all at once.

We complain about the lack of time we have, how busy we are, and how time flies, and this can certainly feel true. But what if we turn that sentiment on its head and instead consider that we do have time - if we’re willing to look at things from a long game perspective. I’ve had to do this in my relatively new career as a writer. One book, one blog post, one project does not make a writing career. I have to play the long game, and, in a way, it’s a relief. I don’t have to accomplish everything all at once. The long game view allows us time to grow, evolve, and even change our minds. It provides an opportunity to gain perspective and create something meaningful over time.

On the other hand, we have to live in the moment because this moment is the only one we are guaranteed. If we’re always looking to the future, if we don’t attend to the things and people that are truly a priority right now, we might miss out on something important.

I find when I am centered by gratitude, I’m anchored in the moment. When I appreciate the people I am with or the experience I am having right now, I’m not focused on the future. I am not thinking about the things I haven’t accomplished yet. I’m not critical of myself or of anyone else.

Some days, the long game perspective serves us well. Other days, we need to keep our head in the here and now. I think it’s a worthwhile to find balance between the two.

On another note…

I’ll be with Mike Squatrito and Heather Rigney at Ink Fish on Main Street in Warren, RI Saturday, December 14th from 1-3 pm. Signed books make great holiday gifts! Stop in and say hello.