At around 10:30 pm on New Year’s Eve, I finally finished the first draft of my latest manuscript. I gave myself a little bit of a break because, you know, global pandemic and all, but I didn’t want to drag this draft into the new year.
Writing ‘the end’ is quite satisfying, but as soon as I finish a manuscript, I experience a moment of crippling self-doubt. What if it’s total shit? What if the plot makes no sense and the characters are shallow? What if I really don’t have any talent?
During the writing process, I experience these sorts of moments a couple of times - once, smack in the middle of the story, when I’m convinced I’ve totally lost the plot, again when I’ve just finished the first draft and have to give it a read through, and finally, in the middle of editing, when I think the whole thing will fall apart.
But this isn’t my first rodeo. Nope. It’s my seventh. Yes, this is the seventh full-length manuscript I’ve completed, so I know the drill by now. Experience helps, which is why my number one piece of advice to new writers is to finish something. Even if it needs crazy edits. Even if the whole project gets scrapped eventually because it really is shit. Even if it sits in a drawer collecting dust. Experience will give you the confidence to know you can get to the other side.
I think what made 2020 so scary is that we really didn’t know if we’d get to the other side, and, if we did make it, we didn’t know what things would look like when we got there. Finishing another project and celebrating the end of a very challenging year has left me with two seemingly opposite but possibly complementary thoughts. First, we gain strength, experience, and wisdom by seeing something through to completion. Also, this moment is the only one that is guaranteed, so we need to live fully in the moment. Striving to balance these two ideas will be part of my work for 2021.
May your New Year be filled with peace, joy, and hope!
