Monday Musings 3-7-22

Instead of thirty one days, March often feels like it lasts thirty one years. On the one hand, this is great, because I’m coming out of my winter hibernation mode and feeling quite productive in my work life. More time means more content produced. But March is also a turbulent month, with spring arriving in fits and starts, and that unsettled quality carries over into my mood. Like the weather, I fluctuate. Some days I’m filled with energy, and other days I have to force myself out of the house. I’m my own personal roller coaster.

When my disposition tends to waver between highs and lows, I have to use a particular set of tricks to keep my balance. Like a bear coming out of its cave into the bright sunshine after a long sleep, I feel a slight bit of disorientation in March. Certainly, I’m eager for the longer days, the warmer air, and the burst of life that comes with springtime, but I’m also trying to shed the sluggishness of winter. I don’t quite have the fortitude yet for the increased activity that comes with this time of year.

So, I have to build it back. Incrementally, I increase my weekly word count, and I plan longer days. I add a little more to my workout schedule. I take advantage of my desire to spring clean, and choose a few projects around the house. While I try to get outside regularly in the winter for a dose of vitamin D, I actually look forward to being outside in the springtime. Most of my book events occur in the spring and summer, so I begin to prep for them.

As I look to the month ahead, I try to focus on March’s potential, while at the same time easing gently into the new season.

“In March winter is holding back and spring is pulling forward. Something holds and something pulls inside of us too.” ― Jean Hersey

Monday Musings 4-19-21

If I’m feeling out of sorts, my balance is the first thing that suffers in my yoga practice. This makes sense on many levels. The mind/body connection is real, and when things are off in my world, that imbalance is often reflected in my body.

We all lose our balance at various points in life. Serious illnesses, death, a global pandemic. We can add more categories to the list based on our unique experiences, but bottom line, every one of us will get thrown a curveball when we expected the change up. Hey, it’s baseball season!

When our month of March got derailed this year, we had to let go of anything non-essential in order to meet the challenge. Now that we are on the other side, there is still a lingering sense of imbalance, in my world at least. So, how do we find our way back to equilibrium, back to our productive, full lives, when the rug was temporarily pulled out from under us?

Here are few things I think about when life cracks me upside the head with the curve…

Relax expectations. Nothing can make us feel worse than not living up to our own expectations. Whether it’s how fast our body heals from a trauma, or how much content we can produce in a month, if we have unrealistic expectations, we’ll find ourselves in a constant state of frustration. When recovering from anything, physically or emotionally, it’s a gift to ourselves if we can relax our expectations.

Add things back slowly and deliberately. We’ve gradually added things back into our daily and weekly routines that bring us joy. Other than those work or home related items that must be tended to, the stuff we’re doing to bring back balance includes walks together, dinners out, time with friends and family. At some point, our work will pick up to full pace again, but work just wasn’t the top of the list first thing. We consciously chose to spend our limited energy on each other and on the things that brought us joy.

Healing is a process. Whether physical or emotional, healing takes however much time it takes. Sometimes it feels like two steps forward, one step back, but I believe our bodies and minds orient toward equilibrium. We want to feel good, be at peace, experience joy. If we allow the healing process to guide us, rather than attempt to dictate how it should go, we may be more at ease even amidst the challenges.

“No person, no place, and no thing has any power over us, for 'we' are the only thinkers in our mind. When we create peace and harmony and balance in our minds, we will find it in our lives.” - Louise L. Hay

IN OTHER NEWS…

I booked my first post- COVID book event! I’ll be at Tampa Bay Comic Con from July 30th to August 1st signing books and presenting. More details to come! If you haven’t had a chance to read the complete HORIZON series, you can find them here on all platforms.

My alter-ego, Maggie Clare, is running a Goodreads Giveaway. Enter to win a FREE ebook copy of Lost and Found, book 3 in the Tactical Solutions International romantic suspense series. If you like your reads a bit steamier, check it out!

Monday Musings 3-29-21

It’s another month with five Mondays. I guess it isn’t surprising that this phenomenon falls on arguably the longest month of the year - March! While spring is certainly inevitable, March in New England is rough, fluctuating between sleet, snow, fog, and glorious sunny days. It’s enough to give us whiplash. However, the addition of an extra Monday means I get to write a cross-over blog for Monday Musings and Dear Maggie!

In all my circles, professional and personal, we’ve been talking about re-entry. With vaccines rolling out, the world is slowly opening back up, but I think many of us are a bit shell shocked. The pause in our lives wasn’t just a blip on the radar, it encompassed an entire year. Now, we have to find our way back to normal, whatever that looks like.

Our difficulties with re-entry might be for different reasons. Maybe we’ve fallen into something of a rut, all too comfortable sticking close to home in our pajamas. Maybe we’re so out of practice with our routines that it seems daunting to restart them. Or maybe, we’re in the opposite position, and our work was vital during the pandemic, leaving us exhausted and wrung out.

Whatever the case, my first thought is that we should be gentle with ourselves. We’ve come through something daunting, something that our generation hasn’t ever faced in quite this way. It’s okay to feel disoriented. It’s okay to feel, well, whatever it is we’re feeling.

My formula for a gentle re-entry is to add things back slowly. I’ve already started with a few things I feel comfortable doing or that bring me joy, like attending yoga classes and going on hikes. Maybe for you it’s taking a walk or meeting a friend for coffee? Our family has also begun to plan travel, but instead of lavish vacations, we’re going to spend time visiting the family and friends we haven’t seen in person for a while.

The slower pace of lockdown wasn’t all bad, and I don’t want to forget some of the healthy lessons. As the world re-opens, I want to be purposeful with where I choose to spend my time, energy, and resources. My schedule often tipped into exhausting pre-lockdown, and there’s no need for that. Balance is my goal.

Pre-lockdown, I had some healthy habits around saying yes to new projects and activities. I’m going to dust them off and implement them again. One of those good habits was to sleep on something before committing to it. If I’m still enthusiastic after letting it sit for a while, then I know it’s a true yes and not a knee-jerk reaction to something that sounds interesting. As my schedule begins to fill again, I want to be sure I’m focused on the things that are most important.

As we’re able to gather in person again and the world begins to right itself, I’m looking forward to many things. I’m also admittedly a bit tentative, but I think that’s to be expected. We’ve had a rough go of it this last year, and it will take time to feel like we’ve fully emerge from our shells!

“Growth is measured by the gentleness and awareness with which we once again pick ourselves up. The openness with which we take the next unknown step into the remarkable mystery of being.” - Stephen Levine

Monday Musings 7-20-20

The week ahead is daunting. I have a virtual book tour scheduled which requires several guest articles and interviews, new and different tasks for the writer’s blog I work for, and a lot of work with the Covid response team at the independent school where I am Board President. Oh, and I’d still like to make progress on my latest manuscript. It will all get done, but knowing what’s ahead is intimidating. Sometimes, I just have to dig in and push onward to the other side, and this is one of those weeks!

When I feel overwhelmed, I’ve learned to rely on my own slightly OCD organizational system. This system helps me feel proactive instead of reactive with my time, and it assures that I also plan enough down time if the crazy pace lasts too long. Over the years of trying to balance career, family, creativity, volunteerism, and my own mental health, I’ve come up with some principles to stay sane. I’ve written a lot about this, especially as it pertains to managing a career in the arts.

Since I am so pressed for time today, I’m cheating a bit and attaching one such article. I needed the reminders today, and maybe they’ll be useful to you as well!

Balance the Busy: A Writer’s Guide

For some people, summer is a relaxing time. When my kids were little and school ended, our schedule slowed down and I took advantage of that time to recharge. Now, not so much. My work heats up with the warm weather, and while I look forward to it, I also know those long, lazy days of summer are a thing of the past. In fact, if I’m not careful, long, lazy days anytime are a thing of the past.

It seems that everyone, writers included, are busy people, working to balance multiple obligations. Because we can, many of us work flexible schedules, which may translate into working all the time. We forget to shut down. We feel overwhelmed. We find we aren’t actually as productive or healthy as we want to be. Over the years, I’ve discovered some principles, proven to translate across careers, that help me stay organized, maintain balance in my life, and get things done. Maybe you’ll find them helpful.

Recognize Your Rhythm

Maybe you’re most creative in the morning over a cup of coffee, or late at night when everyone’s asleep. Maybe you feel super productive in the fall, but can’t seem to get out of your own way in the summer. Whatever the case, everyone has a rhythm – to their day, to their week, to their year. Honor that rhythm, learn to use it to your advantage, and recognize that it may change over time.

Keep a Schedule

Take time to organize yourself. I am an obsessive planner. I use an online calendar and an intricate system of notebooks and to-do lists to stay organized. To friends and family, my habits may seem a bit obsessive, but maintaining control over my time is the single most important factor impacting my productivity. When something unexpected happens – I’m sick, my kids are sick, my computer dies – I do what I have to do to get through, and as soon as possible, I sit down to reorganize. If I’m proactive as opposed to reactive with regard to managing my time, I feel less stressed and I’m definitely more productive.

Prioritize

There is always more to do, but not everything should make the top of your to-do list. Prioritize your daily tasks, writing projects, appointments, etc. Some things can be pushed off if you don’t get to them, but some things come with a deadline! Make it a habit to attend to the priorities first.

Mind Your Mental and Physical Health

When I was in college, inevitably I’d get sick as soon as I went home for a vacation. It was like my body did what it had to do to get me through exams, or a big project, or whatever, and then it totally shut down. I’ve learned it doesn’t have to come to that if I pay attention and take care of myself. Self-care is important. Block off time for the gym, a yoga class, dinner out. When deadlines loom or the to-do list is jam-packed, it might seem practical to bump one of these things. But self-care shouldn’t take last place, penciled in only after all the “work” things. Rather, it should hold equal importance. It has to. Much of the writer’s life is solitary. We’re alone in our own minds for a good bit of the day, and this isn’t necessarily good for our mental health. So be mindful to step away, seek out the company of others, and take care of yourself.

Just Say No

It’s tempting to say yes to every interesting project that comes along, especially if you are trying to launch a new career. Maybe for a little while, you do need to say yes often, but pretty soon you may become overwhelmed, or find yourself committed to projects that aren’t really the best use of your time. When considering a new project, I always sleep on it before making a commitment. Either my interest will grow or it will dissipate. If I’m still enthusiastic after a couple of days, I’ll figure out how to make it work. If not, I graciously say no thank you.

 The culture of busy isn’t going anywhere. In our time of instant communication, real-time information, and constant connectivity, we can easily become overwhelmed. A mindful habit of working with our personal rhythms, organizing and prioritizing our work, and paying attention to our own good health will help.

Monday Musings 8-26-19

This morning it feels like fall has already arrived. While we have a few more days of summer vacation left before the routine of school and sports and kids’ activities officially begins, we can all feel it in the air. I’ll be sad to see summer fade, but it was a good one. We filled our days with barbecues, family, friends, swimming, and amusement parks, and our nights with fires, s’mores, concerts, and more than a few bottles of good wine. Yes, we all worked. It was Comic Con season for me, and those can be exhausting, but still, the different rhythm of summer provides a needed change, a break from the routine.

Now, along with the crisp days of autumn, I look forward to my most productive writing season. Over the course of my professional life, I’ve learned that I work best when I honor my personal rhythms. When I recognize that there is a natural time when I am most creative and a time when I need to slow down, I feel more balanced and ultimately, in the long run, more productive.

Here’s a section from a post I wrote a while ago titled Inside a Writer’s Mind: On Working with a Calendar. The focus of the article was about taking control of our time, but this particular section focused on honoring our natural rhythms. As we head into fall, which for many of us means an uptick in activity and overall busyness, I think it’s worth sharing.

Structure Your Work Life to Honor Your Personal Rhythms

Step one is recognizing you have a rhythm. A friend of mine, who works a full-time job in a different field, writes during his train commute to and from work. He plugs in the ear buds and hits an impressive daily word count. Another friend works late into the evening, when the house is quiet and everyone else is asleep.

Writing, in one capacity or another, is my full-time job now, and I’m learning a great deal about rhythm. For example, I’m productive with task-oriented items like scheduling social media in the morning, but I couldn’t solve a plot tangle before noon to save my life. Likewise, I have to keep things simple on Fridays because I’m pretty worn out, but I can often get some solid creative writing in over the weekend.

When I’m drafting a novel, I need several uninterrupted hours for my creativity to flow and to hit my daily word count. It’s tricky for me to work one hour without interruption never mind four, but I know this is what I need to do. Draft weeks wind up with a unique rhythm, and I’m often hiding at Starbucks to make it work!

I’m also noticing a rhythm to the year. Summers are busy with cons and conferences, so I can’t plan to draft a novel, but I can write blog posts and short stories. In the fall, when everyone is back to school and out of the house, I’m ready to find those uninterrupted hours and renew my affection for chai lattes.

There’s no right way to schedule your time, only the way that works best for you. When I respect my natural rhythms and organize my work life around them, I find I’m much more productive, and certainly much happier.

Here’s a link to the whole article: Inside a Writer’s Mind. Even though I wrote it with other creative types in mind, the tips come from my work as a teacher, school administrator, mom, and eventually, writer. I hope they’re helpful. Enjoy these last few days of summer!