Sometimes the work we need to do to make our world a better place seems overwhelming, like anything we do as individuals just isn’t enough. And in a way, this is true. Deep-rooted, systemic issues require more than our individual efforts. They require cultural, institutional, and sometimes legal reform, which doesn’t happen overnight, and takes a collective effort.
But here today, at my kitchen table, I’ve been thinking about my role as an individual, about the things I can do. I can listen. Really listen to people who have had a different life experience than me. I can do this without defensiveness. I can do this without making any of it about me. It’s not my turn for that. I can aspire to think, speak, and act first with kindness. I can use the power of my words to connect with people.
I’ve had the honor and pleasure of learning from other amazing writers, of becoming immersed in their worlds and their words. One such author is Jacqueline Woodson. She read an except from her YA novel If You Come Softly at a writer’s conference I attended years ago. She pulled me so deeply into her character's world that I emerged transformed. Her words helped me internalized the idea that I will never own certain experiences. They will forever be outside my frame of reference. But her words also helped me to understand. They made me want to do better, be better, and not rest in the comfort of my own experiences.
Step off a curb if a white person comes toward you Don’t look them in the eye. Yes sir. No sir. My apologies. Her eyes straight ahead, my mother is miles away from here.
Then her mouth softens, her hand moves gently over my brother’s warm head. He is three years old, his eyes wide open to the world, his too big ears already listening. We’re as good as anybody, my mother whispers.
As good as anybody.
- Jacqueline Woodson, from Brown Girl Dreaming
