laughter

Monday Musings 7-18-22

So, there’s a lot going on at my house right now, and some of it is, well, messy. My life always has the potential to get very messy. With four kids, five pets, and a busy career to balance, I never really know what’s around the corner, but sometimes the universe outdoes itself.

With family in town, my daughter getting ready to move across the country, and the busiest book travel schedule I’ve had in years, the pipes in our fully finished guest suite downstairs decided to fail spectacularly. Water also seeped under the floor on the main level, so we’ll need to have some of that flooring ripped up and refinished too. Mess. Everywhere.

The mitigation, demolition, and construction teams have been fabulous, and I’m sure the space will be beautiful, but seriously? I’ve had to dig deep into my toolbox of mindfulness techniques to maintain any sense of equilibrium, but after dusting off the rust from the last disaster, here’s what seems to work.

Let go. Hahahaha. But really, when we accept that so many things are simply out of our control, we don’t have to hold onto them anymore. We can let go and…

Breathe. My two decades plus of yoga practice has helped with this. When I simplify down to what’s essential, the list is pretty short. Taking one breath after another, putting one foot in front of the other, will eventually move me to the other side of the mess.

Okay, you say, but real stuff has to happen in the midst of the chaos, so how do you manage that?

Break projects down into manageable pieces. When I look at the project in its entirety, I’m for sure overwhelmed, but when I tackle things in small bits, I’m satisfied that I’ve accomplished something every day, I can see the forward progress, and I can continue to function day to day.

This works for writing books too. If I focused on the fact that I have approximately 90k words ahead of me every time I started a new project, I’d probably never write a single word again. Instead, I write scene to scene and chapter to chapter, until eventually I’ve created a whole book.

Laughter is excellent medicine. At the end of the day, laughing feels good. According to research from the Mayo Clinic, laughter can increase oxygen to the heart, lungs and muscles, increase the endorphins that are released by your brain, improve your mood and reduce physical pain. Not too shabby.

While I certainly wasn’t laughing when a cascade of water took out my entire sub-level, I definitely relied on funny cat memes to cheer me up in the days following!

Anyway, as I sit on my front porch listening to the soft summer rain, I am reminded that inner peace is always accessible, regardless of the circumstances. It’s a simple idea, but one that’s not always easy to embrace!

“Nothing can disturb your peace of mind unless you allow it to.”
Roy T. Bennett

Monday Musings 11-1-21

November 3rd is National Stress Awareness Day. I didn’t know there was such a thing until I was asked to write an article about it for Inkitt, the publishing company I work for. When I interviewed several employees, we talked about the challenges of working in the modern era, how we create balance between work and life, and how we care for our mental and physical well-being.

We all identified similar issues that contribute to our stress. The technology that makes our lives easier also has a flip side in that it’s possible to never disconnect. Working in the creative space, we’re all passionate about our careers and enjoy what we do. In some ways, that makes it even harder to step away. I feel a bit guilty complaining about the stress level of my work, when honestly, its my dream job. Still, unhealthy habits take a toll, and the publishing industry has its own unique type of stressors and headaches.

I’ve blogged about this topic before and shared many of my own tricks to help with balance, productivity, time management, and stress relief. Today, as I write this from the Nantucket ferry, after a Halloween weekend of silliness and laughter, I realize that having fun should be on the very top of the list of stress relieving activities.

Ray and I celebrated the 30th anniversary of our first date on Halloween. I know, I can’t believe I’m this old either. But anyway, one of the reasons I think our marriage has lasted so well for so long is that we really, truly have fun together. We dress up for King Richard’s Faire and laugh our asses off at the off-color shows. We enjoy Halloween as much as our kids. We laugh often and play well together.

When we don’t agree on a particular version of fun (for example, he thinks playing golf is fun, whereas my fun happens later over dinner and cocktails, and he doesn’t think Comic Cons are any fun at all), we still support each other in having that fun independently. So, I would add this little piece of advice to the article I wrote. Make time for fun. Laugh often and easily. It’s good for us!

“Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine.” — Lord Byron

IN OTHER NEWS:

I’ll be at Rhode Island Comic Con this weekend. You can find me signing books at table 619, and here’s my panel schedule:

  • World Building: Mind Your Myths and Backstory - Saturday, November 6 at 11 am in Room 551

  • Writing the Other: Creating Characters Outside Your Comfort Zone - Sunday, November 7 at 12:15 pm

I’ll be at the annual RI Author Expo on Saturday, December 11th. Signed books make great holiday gifts, and our Expo features many talented local authors. The program and panel schedule will be coming soon! NOTE:The venue has changed to the Crowne Plaza, Warwick from 9 am-3 pm.

Here are some photos from our Nantucket weekend!